When I was 16 my boyfriend and I decided to make a baby. My family did everything possible to try to convince me to abort her. They even had other teenagers who had recently had abortions call me and try to talk me into abortion by claiming it was just tissue. They failed and I had a beautiful baby girl. When I was 18 I found out I was pregnant and the family did the same thing only this time they talked me into going to see a counselor. Unfortunately, they succeeded and I will always regret making the choice to walk through that door. Since I was 18 I was torn because I felt abortion was wrong based on my own experience but who was I to stand up and say so. That would make me a hypocrite you would think. So here I am a hypocrite to tell the world before you go in and even talk to someone in an abortion clinic you need to read my story in the poem below. Since that time I have also given birth to a son. I now have a daughter and a son and two beautiful granddaughters who are here because I chose life despite the pressure that was put on me to terminate it. I have never regretted giving birth or the sacrifices I made to have my children. Sometimes, I look back and wish I had gone to a prom or even graduated with my class, but then I look forward and realize because I chose life my daughter was able to go to her prom. Because I chose life I was able to witness my granddaughter emerge into this world. Because I chose life I have love in my life and I am not alone. I will always regret allowing someone to influence me into walking into an abortion clinic. Thirty years and I still cry as if it were yesterday. I will no longer hide in the shadows or remain silent because of fear of being branded a hypocrite or judged for what happened in the past. What happened to me has probably happened to thousands if not millions of young woman and girls since that time. I am Pro Life and want to encourage all the women out there who were told abortion is okay and persuaded, threatened, influenced, lied to, forced, or manipulated into walking into an abortion clinic and are still questioning what happened to read my story. If you wish that you had not been given an option and made a choice out of ignorance and have been ashamed or afraid to speak up the time has come to speak up. There is nothing I will ever be able to do to make up for the life that was lost. What I can do is share my story and pray that it helps someone choose life.

Innocence Lost

Remembering that day in May – when i became corporate prey
On this unforgettable day – an innocent child was thrown away
last night as i lay in bed – i read the news here’s what it said
a camera caught this lady’s words – and in her words my stories heard

When i was just a teen – that was when I became mommy
soon the year was 86 and i found myself in a fix
eighteen single on my own – another one would soon come home
the other one now was two – i did not know what to do

did the baby have a soul – when was it considered whole
questions i had in leaps and bounds – but no answers could be found
My family said get rid of it – you do not need anymore kids
couldn’t make them understand – and i tried to take a stand

Family made the appointment you see – for me to ask about baby
she dropped me off at the door – smiled and waved as she turned the corner
i went inside just to see – what they knew about unborn babies
did it now have a soul – or if it was considered whole

i didn’t have long to wait – to see a counselor that decided my fate
nervous frightened that i was – what happened next forever judged
she gave me a cup, or so she said – just to take off the edge
i took what was inside – and she said this paper i had to sign

i signed the paper and i sighed – and asked her now what’s on my mind
she said my questions had to wait – the doctor was ready i would be late
i questioned why they felt the need – they had to examine me
i was told it is because – can’t answer questions until this is done

on the table there is no doubt – apprehension is what i felt
relax they said it’s just an exam – but that was not their true plan
first came the stabbing pain – in my privates parts i felt maimed
struggling next wanting to throw up – pain so intense i couldn’t get up

the nurse quickly came around, the table – and she held me down
she said don’t struggle it’s too late – the pill made you dilate
you may hemorrhage, you will bleed – until it’s done you cannot leave
Still i fought to get away – they strapped me down, held me at bay

it was probably better for me – then what happened to my baby
whatever it was they put in place – it felt worse than any rape.
i struggled but could not flee – from the machine put inside me
it moved around without a doubt – rape was what it was about

i felt it sucking my insides out – killing my child there was no doubt
the pain i felt must not have been – as bad for me as it was for him
i always felt it was a boy – he was to be mama’s joy
what came next you have to know – was the final crushing blows

24 weeks is all he said – in this day and age it could have lived
i was more than halfway through – this pregnancy it was true
there was nothing i could do – tears in my eyes what to do
the sent me out of their back door – said to rest for three or four

i walked out into the bright day – crying my body & heart filled with pain
no one was there waiting for me – no one at all to grieve with me
the person who left me had driven away – not telling me their plans that day
or their complicity with the entity – that took my baby from me

it seems that there was no intent – to answer questions it wasn’t legit
the appointment to which i was bade – was only to destroy what God had made
no one cared even to see – if someone was there when i was freed
not even change for a bus pass home – i sat there waiting all alone

all i wanted was to die – i felt culpable and cannot lie
suicide is what was on my mind – and on this day i did try
my conscience would not let this rest
guilt consumed me in excess

over twenty years have now passed – i still cry about the past
what was read just last night – brought perspective into the light
the director of the place i went – was caught on camera giving evidence
that the doctors they employed – would often try to fill the voids

women that were pregnant – were used for their evil intent
gestational age was what they need – they would take a woman’s seed
to fill the orders that were made – for body parts, tissue, or a leg,
a head, an eye, whatever, they paid – for their research, or as an aid

She said the doctors had a need – seeking out women to fulfill their greed
they would then tailor their deeds – to keep damage from the parts they need
if it felt like rape to me – what must it have felt like for my baby
safe and comfy in his home – suddenly they took his arm

the horror of what they have done – not just to me but to my son
came crashing down once again – how can they say its not a sin
upon my soul this has weighed – to rest my child must be laid
This confession the world must see – and know who it was that did this to me

If my telling can prevent, – another baby lost to evil intent
sisters don’t lose your soul – to that evil greedy troll
they do not care one whit – on your reluctance they will spit
Abortion is the only way – to fill the orders they have that day

held me down, wouldn’t let me up, – imagine yourself in my spot
they did not care a whit – the abortion they performed wasnt legit
the gestational age was too far,- still they put him in a jar
in my then naive innocent mind – i never read what i signed

until the evidence that i heard,- i have felt internally torn
knowing that it wasn’t right,- how would i express my plight?
a hypocrite for what was done,- i’m sure i’m not the only one
all these years it took to see – the innocence that was ripped from me

The world’s loss was their financial gain – no one should have to die this way
now i reveal all this day – and the name of the company that preyed
what was done can’t be undone – now, it’s too late for my son
Planned Parenthood was the one – the name is named – my story is done.